A Million Little Pieces
| i press your hands against minerelishing the heat.i feel the veins stand proudlyacross the fleshy canvas.the rush of pounding music…how beautiful to know your blood runs through mine.-daphne——————————————————————- MOMENTS
I watched my mother changing for work today and I was struck at how beautiful she was. I watched as the towel draped lopsidedly over her one confused breast, wondering where the other one had gone to. I didn’t even know myself.
Breast cancer she had told us over prayer one night, right before she broke down and gave a deep howl that was almost unhuman. As her daughter, I felt nothing. I know I prayed, but I can’t even remember what I said or who I prayed to.
Her ordeal was a blur of words to me. Chemotherapy. Mastectomy. I didn’t understand what it all meant. I conditioned myself to feel nothing, so I understood nothing.
Only then, when she was changing for work and I sat on the bed, mesmerized by the closed wound on her chest that something within me stirred. I wanted to run my hands over the place where the breast that I had once nursed from had been. I wanted to feel the rough scars on my fingertips so that I too would know. So that I too could understand like she understood.
But a glass wall stood between my hand and her scar. I felt a deep sense of regret that I had not understood before. As if sensing my thoughts, she stopped combing her hair and looked at me in the mirror. She saw me as I saw me and she was full of understanding. She said nothing. She didn’t have to. All she did was smile.
___________________________________________________
Currently Reading:
A Million Little Pieces by James Frey
|
|
This entry was posted
on Sunday, January 8th, 2006 at 7:23 pm and is filed under Uncategorized.
You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed.
You can skip to the end and leave a response. Pinging is currently not allowed.
January 12th, 2006 at 2:54 pm
Touching… and here we fool ourselves, thinking we know what life is about.
Thank you
January 13th, 2006 at 4:14 am
very melancholic piece!… I’ll put that book on my list.. thanks!
January 24th, 2006 at 10:28 am
Your entry really touched me. How odd it is that we as humans close ourselves off from touching,and feeling what is really going on inside of us at moments. It’s like we disconnect ourselves from feeling at all sometimes.
January 25th, 2006 at 4:19 am
I can understand the feeling of not knowing what tragedy means and only later, after years, realising how bad it was.
My mom went through the same and at that time I didn’t know one bit what she was going through. But when you suddenly realise the pain they have gone through, you will be suprised how they went through it, and still are, everyday when see that scar.
They carry themselves as though nothing happened and still portray a picture perfect smile. Something that I have come to believe, only mothers can.
January 28th, 2006 at 6:21 am
you are a beatıful gırl I like you and waiting four your message I kıss you
February 4th, 2006 at 12:53 pm
February 4th, 2006 at 12:53 pm
You are beatiful girl i like you
February 4th, 2006 at 12:54 pm
February 9th, 2006 at 12:26 am
OMG, the girl is saying that her mother has breast cancer and you people are still hitting on her? WTH!! Are you guys idiots? Is that the line you give to all women, “you are a beautiful girl i like you”? At least pretend that you care enough to devote 5 seconds of your time to fix your grammar.
Your line is weak, she probably heard that line from a billion losers already. You do not ever ever say beautiful as an opener. You could have said, I like your hair, do you always get it done or is it naturally like that, or you could have said I love your pics, it brings out your eyes, did a professional did those? Then follow up with a I’m in a hurry, maybe we can talk later.
You could have even come up with a humorous line like “Hey girl, do you need a strong bodyguard? I see all these clowns hitting on you, maybe I can put my arms around you to protect you.
She even gave her list of fav books and songs, you could have used it to get a connection. Also you never ever hit on a girl when she is talking about her Mom with breast cancer. It’s insensitive, not to mention idiotic.
February 9th, 2006 at 12:29 am
Blah nevermind! I misinterpreted. Now I look like a fool. It’s a book, thought it was personal but do listen to what I said. Work on your pick up artist maneuvers.
February 21st, 2006 at 5:09 am
I share the same emotions though at first, mine we’re a little bit more hostile–towards the unknown, and God.I have been a nurse to hundreds of people, but being a nurse to my own mother at the time she was diagnosed with breast cancer proved to be the most challenging yet. Unfortunately, 24 days after the surgeon handed down the painful verdict, I had to leave for the United States.If I have a chance to redo a part of my life, I would have never left on June 25, 2003 and instead stayed in the loving arms of my mother as she pursues the greatest battle of her life.
March 7th, 2006 at 6:59 pm
just need to squeeze this in anywhere here.. haha! are u a pinay? if so.. let me just tell you.. that i love your complexion.. and yeah.. that body to-die-for!
March 29th, 2006 at 3:44 am
hai…
my nick name is Ryan
and i want invite all of you to be my friends…
call me anytime you like …
with your smile…
thanks
March 29th, 2006 at 3:47 am
whoever you are…
bad or preety…
call me back…
April 12th, 2006 at 11:25 pm
inspiring…. thanks 4 sharing…
May God bless you and your mother….
April 17th, 2006 at 1:49 am
i agree with ryan… hindi nyo na sya iginalang…
April 18th, 2006 at 1:19 am
hi nice too meet u
April 26th, 2006 at 10:06 pm
hi, call me please! I don’t have a friend
April 26th, 2006 at 10:07 pm
no comment…
May 6th, 2006 at 5:32 am
This reminds me how my mom struggled for the diabetes she had. I couldn’t stand watching her in pain, when she felt it in her legs, when she had to vomit the food she had eaten, when she had to underwent hemodialysis. May her soul rest in peace.
May 12th, 2006 at 9:46 pm
very touching and inspiring story, thanx for sharing it….
May 14th, 2006 at 8:14 am
hey Daphne.thats very touching! not all people are close with close with their MOMs
May 17th, 2006 at 11:24 pm
Dear good friends,
It sends the writing from the Republic of Korea.. Everybody assist.. I am 41 years old.. The wife and with daughter two it lives together. I traffic accident in the no license vehicles before 2 months and is revealed the piece leg which it lost.. Currently it lives, to netizen everybody it asks a help too much with difficult. The bay assist.. entrusting it gives little by little kindly. Thank you. It will read a contents and when to move it will be good even in the different site
We you wait a small sincerity.. Assist..
Thank you.
God blessing
Seoul Korea
Support account :
Kookmin Bank 581201-01-166652 ki tack oh
July 4th, 2006 at 2:27 am
LIFE…
July 28th, 2006 at 4:05 pm
NICE BOOK TO RECOMMEND, I THINK…
August 9th, 2006 at 1:41 am
hmmmmmm,……
August 20th, 2006 at 7:18 am
NICE
September 6th, 2006 at 2:56 pm
i like your
October 26th, 2006 at 11:27 pm
….
October 30th, 2006 at 8:57 pm
very nice & very inspiring. I love what I read today!…
November 8th, 2006 at 5:05 pm
love love
November 30th, 2006 at 7:58 am
hey daphne,
i like the way you wrote it,God bless your soul!it is so touching and i am moved.it’s a rare find in the US with this kind of mother-daughter closeness.i like you,you’re being honest.take care.tnx.
December 5th, 2006 at 6:46 am
hello daphne,im leslie jarantilla,you know what? i really like the way you wrote.i was touched on it and i felt like im crying.it so beautiful..i hope i can read like you had wrote some day…wonderful daphne..may the blessings of the lord be with you always
December 5th, 2006 at 6:53 am
i like you alot
December 8th, 2006 at 6:05 am
Dear Friends……!
“MERRY CHRISTMAS AND HAPPY NEW YEAR”.
Friendly Yours,
Gani,
Dubai, UAE.
rafiunnissa@hotmail.com
Mobile : 22 43 765.
December 22nd, 2006 at 1:24 am
Dear Friends…..!
I am Gani, from Dubai, United Arab Emirates.
I seek your friendship.
Please accept me as your friend.
You can reach me on : rafiunnissa@hotmail.com
Thanking You,
Friendly Yours,
Gani.
February 20th, 2007 at 6:01 pm
wala
March 10th, 2007 at 1:22 pm
siip.. yo’a
March 13th, 2007 at 5:20 pm
ikhyrdesdfsxgiljkly
March 13th, 2007 at 5:22 pm
rock n’ roll dude!!
March 24th, 2007 at 12:09 pm
March 24th, 2007 at 12:14 pm
it’s all abaout my life,please give me the truth,lie and cry
March 24th, 2007 at 12:40 pm
What a Sad thing,.. but don`t be discourage!! make this thing as a great inspiration in you`re life…. Always remember that In evry situation that happen to us GOD has always a reason.
March 24th, 2007 at 1:12 pm
mas ini knpa yah internet nya ga friendster nya ga bisa usahakan dong
April 12th, 2007 at 8:07 pm
cibai…x pat logout……………………………………………………………kimak juak
April 12th, 2007 at 8:08 pm
keep rocknroll
April 12th, 2007 at 8:16 pm
pls bring back friendster online!!!!!
April 12th, 2007 at 8:56 pm
Kurang ajar…frienster…
Gw mo buka Fs gw,keluarnya account ginian..
Dasar…
MONYET….
April 12th, 2007 at 11:10 pm
i love you…!
punk princess
rock my world….
April 12th, 2007 at 11:11 pm
i love you…!
punk princess
rock my world….
April 12th, 2007 at 11:22 pm
hi
April 12th, 2007 at 11:23 pm
heart emo!!
April 12th, 2007 at 11:24 pm
nice very good .??
April 12th, 2007 at 11:25 pm
MP3-Codes.com
April 13th, 2007 at 12:37 am
pls dont put this maintenance again….im hard up/.,.,
April 13th, 2007 at 12:42 am
ah. yEaryt!!
April 13th, 2007 at 1:00 am
yeah dats life my dear!
April 13th, 2007 at 1:29 am
nice and very inspiring…
April 13th, 2007 at 1:30 am
uki…..
April 13th, 2007 at 1:31 am
such a new creative things….
April 13th, 2007 at 1:57 am
hi guyss add me on friend ok?
April 13th, 2007 at 1:59 am
i mean on friendster….
April 20th, 2007 at 6:02 pm
haiiiiii,
April 20th, 2007 at 6:40 pm
cibai punyer com tk leh buka friendster pecah kan cam nie baru tao
April 20th, 2007 at 6:41 pm
hay wish ko lng m aayos na friendster ko
May 14th, 2007 at 1:11 pm
add me up on fwendster carrel@carrel.carrel
September 20th, 2008 at 12:43 pm
http://www.librarything.com/profile/realringtones
September 20th, 2008 at 7:33 pm
http://www.librarything.com/profile/sonyericssonringtones
September 20th, 2008 at 7:58 pm
http://www.librarything.com/profile/xanax2
September 21st, 2008 at 7:01 am
http://www.vidilife.com/index.cfm?f=profile.main&intUserAccountID=1147009
September 23rd, 2008 at 11:05 pm
http://www.mylot.com/freepolyphonicringt
September 24th, 2008 at 8:47 pm
http://www.bebo.com/RingtoneR4
September 25th, 2008 at 9:33 am
http://www.bebo.com/KnockOffDesigK15
September 25th, 2008 at 11:33 pm
http://www.bebo.com/FreeRingtoneF98
September 26th, 2008 at 2:46 pm
http://movadowatches8.hi5.com/
September 26th, 2008 at 6:46 pm
http://atomicwatches.hi5.com/
September 28th, 2008 at 2:43 am
http://haloween8.hi5.com/
September 29th, 2008 at 5:17 am
http://ritalin7.vidilife.com/
September 30th, 2008 at 3:49 pm
http://freepolyphonicringtones7.vidilife.com/
September 30th, 2008 at 5:47 pm
http://autoloans.vidilife.com/
October 12th, 2008 at 5:51 am
http://www.mylot.com/lgringtones
October 12th, 2008 at 7:18 pm
http://www.mylot.com/sprintringtones
October 13th, 2008 at 10:16 pm
http://www.vidilife.com/index.cfm?f=profile.main&intUserAccountID=1147064
October 15th, 2008 at 3:49 pm
http://www.vidilife.com/index.cfm?f=profile.main&intUserAccountID=1148953
October 18th, 2008 at 3:38 am
http://tagheuerwatches8.hi5.com/
October 20th, 2008 at 5:12 am
http://halloweentheme7.vidilife.com/
October 20th, 2008 at 6:20 pm
http://autoloans.vidilife.com/
October 22nd, 2008 at 5:06 pm
http://funnyringtones7.vidilife.com/
October 23rd, 2008 at 3:01 am
http://freeblackberryringtones7.vidilife.com/
October 28th, 2008 at 3:50 am
http://halloweencostumes99.vidilife.com/
October 28th, 2008 at 3:51 am
http://michelereplicawatches.vidilife.com/
October 28th, 2008 at 5:54 am
http://blackberryringtones99.vidilife.com/
October 28th, 2008 at 12:24 pm
http://rolexwatches99.vidilife.com/
October 28th, 2008 at 4:43 pm
http://authentichandbags.vidilife.com/
October 29th, 2008 at 2:06 am
http://rolexreplica99.vidilife.com/
October 29th, 2008 at 3:13 pm
http://buycialis99.vidilife.com/
October 30th, 2008 at 7:56 pm
http://topamax.vidilife.com/
October 31st, 2008 at 10:02 am
http://klonopin.vidilife.com/
November 1st, 2008 at 12:16 am
http://seroquel.vidilife.com/
November 2nd, 2008 at 4:12 am
http://botox99.vidilife.com/